• Breaking the silence, the road to victory

VICTORY CHEST

~ Memories of my husband lost too soon to cancer and life with our amazing daughters

VICTORY CHEST

Tag Archives: spring break

Vacation for three

14 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by Victory Chest in Road to victory

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Tags

spring break, three, traveling, vacation

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I struggled to determine where to take the girls on vacation but knew it needed to be somewhere warm.  My choices seemed quite limited because it was be the first time just the three of us would be traveling.  I needed a place that would not be too chaotic.

In addition to the apprehension of traveling with the girls, I was also concerned about the emotions that would be evoked by not having David with us on vacation. We enjoyed our stay, the weather was perfect, the people were friendly, the girls had so much fun, I was also able to relax. Despite all this, there were nightly tears as my daughter(s) cried about missing their Dad. In some ways the vacation made this worse since we were constantly surrounded with children playing with their Dads.

We had “family” pictures taken while on vacation. This started off rather painful with my older daughter crying that we cannot have family pictures without Daddy. Saddened, I explained to her that we will forever have Daddy with us. Shortly after, she bounced back to her chipper self. When we looked at the pictures, she pointed to one and happily she said “Daddy is right there”.

Traveling was relatively ok and my younger daughter associates flying with her Dad. It seems to make her feel closer to her Dad and once we are at cruising altitude she looks outside the window contently saying “I see my Daddy”.

Overall, I felt a sense of accomplishment knowing that we managed relatively ok considering that it was the first time it was just the three of us.

Spring break vacation

30 Sunday Mar 2014

Posted by Victory Chest in Road to victory

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Tags

family picture, Missing you, spring break, vacation

Since school will be out for spring break, I plan to take the girls on vacation. It was a vacation we planned last year but could not make it and we kept postponing it due to David’s illness. We always remained optimistic that he would get a “break” and would be able to take the vacation…sadly, it was not the case.

My older daughter has been counting down to the break and frankly, I was looking forward to it as well.  Now I am overwhelmed, saddened, and afraid of going on a vacation without David, our pilot. How are we going on a vacation without David? How would I handle seeing other families that seem complete?  How will the kids handle seeing all the other Dads?  Is this life as I know it now?

David who always tried to ensure that I do not wait until the last minute to start packing (he never succeeded). David who always laughed at the amount of luggage I hauled as he fit all his items in a carry-on. David who could navigates well with an old fashioned map, in fact I think he secretly preferred it to the new age car navigation systems. David who put the “r” in relaxation once we get to our final destination.

I am also saddened as I realized that we will never have a family vacation picture with all of us in it. The last vacation we took together, how I wished I approached a stranger to take a picture of all four of us together. There is no more opportunity to do this and I am still beating myself up for that.

I know I will be constantly reminded of David on the vacation. I just hope sweet memories will get me through the sadness of missing him. I also hope that the girls will have a nice time even as they are reminded that we are incomplete without David.

The picture below is the closest to a family picture from our last vacation as we alternated taking pictures.

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